NPR onesie from Raygun.
Just looking at pictures of Harper at one month old I can see that she’s really changed. She’s not a newborn anymore, she’s a baby. She shot over 10 pounds really quickly, and now she’s moving into that adorably chubby stage.
People always think she’s a boy, either because of her name or because they see her dressed in blue. We’re not big fans of pink, but I guess the joke will be on us if she becomes a big girly girl someday.
She loooves bathtime.
Sometimes I look at my red-haired, blue-eyed, long-limbed baby and think, “Is this really my child?” She looks so much like the Corey side that I don’t really see myself in her. Except for one thing — her hands. Something in the way she holds her tiny little fingers reminds me of me.
She is kind of balding in front, just like an old man. But she has this little peach fuzz coming in. I’m not sure what color it is yet. Her eyebrows have started to darken. To me they look red just like her hair.
I wanted so badly for her to start smiling, and not just the contended little smiles she makes in her sleep when she’s finished eating. And she did! In fact she makes these huge grins and little coos that are so adorable. One time I was holding her in front of a mirror and she practiced her big grins for a few minutes. Ah, I live for that stuff.
I don’t think she is an overly fussy baby, but when she does cry she goes to Defcon 1 in about 2 seconds (and with real tears these days, which makes me so sad). She’s got some lungs! And as my friend Brigid said, when a baby cries like that, 5 minutes feels like an hour. I get desperate to fix whatever is wrong, but sometimes I can’t figure it out, and that is so frustrating. Combine that with the lack of sleep and we are all cranky sometimes. I am nowhere near, as Oprah says, my best self. In fact I’ve been closer to my worst self more than I care to admit in these two months. But it’s amazing how just one night of good sleep will restore you to normal. Moms-to-be, take heart in that, because it really is true.
Speaking of sleep, she seems to be an exceptional baby for her ability to sleep at night. I’m sure that will waver when she gets to different stages (teething and such), but she pretty consistently sleeps most of the night. Early mornings are the only problem, since we’d like to keep sleeping and she often doesn’t. I actually think overall she needs to sleep more and take more naps during the day, but I’m not sure how to get her started on any kind of schedule. I just kind of let her sleep when she wants to, but she often wakes after 10 minutes or so. Does anyone know of good books related to baby sleep schedules?
Yes, I did this to my child.
The other day I watched the documentary “Bully” and I think it upset me in a way it wouldn’t have before I had a child. I was just thinking how much I wanted to protect her from those kind of things out in the world and I won’t be able to. I know what it’s like to be a shy, introverted child who lacks confidence. One of my biggest hopes for her is that she feels confident in who she is, even if she, like me, is the kind of kid that would rather have her nose in a book than anything else.
But there will be plenty of years to worry about those things. For now we’re taking it one day at a time, marveling at how she changes every day.
We took her to the Golden Gate bridge to take some pictures last week and it was so foggy we didn’t get any with the bridge in them. It was sort of a metaphor for life with a baby — there’s a lot you can’t control, and you just have to roll with it.
At least we get great views at the dog park.